


Rickship

by orphan_account



Category: Rick and Morty
Genre: Comedy, Dysfunctional Family, Family, Other, Relationship(s)
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2017-07-15
Updated: 2017-07-15
Packaged: 2018-12-01 16:03:30
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings, Graphic Depictions Of Violence
Chapters: 1
Words: 697
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/11489850
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/orphan_account/pseuds/orphan_account
Summary: Smith family's relationship with Rick. Maybe MA later on.This is a complete mess of a story. It'll be constantly changing, so yeah it's a mess. Like me.SUCK-SUCK-SUCK MY BALLS! I SAY THIS SHIT ALLLLL THE TIME!__________"Although he'd worn the girls down all night and finally had them eating out of the palms of his hands, he rather not deal with that fucking monstrosity of a mess. He didn't want to chance it. He had delt with their species before and even though he was into freaky shit, there was NO preparing him from that rabbit hole he had once delved into years ago. He STILL had nightmares."





	Rickship

**Author's Note:**

> Tell me what chu want, what chu rly want. I want- I want not to be an asshole monster. I wrote this drunk, so shut the fuck up. I'll fix it laterr sorry
> 
>  
> 
> I might not come back to this. I don't know what I want.

"OOAHH FUCK! R-RUN, M-MORTY!"

Running alongside his grandfather, his arm was in danger of being tugged out by the socket. Morty was scared. His mouth was dry, he was hungry, and he was constantly close to tripping over the never-ending staircase.

Despite traveling to more terrifying and messed-up realities, the jarring optical illusion of stairs made his nerves on end and his head continuously spin. He could handle it, but not for long.

Using his frabelon blaster, Rick shot over his shoulder, aiming at the quadruplet alien. They seemed that they were a group of hot chicks.  
He had hit on them drunk (as usual) and hadn't notice that they were all a singular being attached by their ONE anus. He had thought that they were just a bunch a ditzy college girls at Squaunchy's party, explaining their actions; moving altogether as a small group, sharing drinks and going to the bathroom in a pack. He did NOT expect a weirdo butthole monster.

He didn't figure out until waayyy later. The five of them were in a secluded corner of the party, drunk off their asses, giggling about Rick's molecular deconstruction shit of a joke when they heard a small fart. 

"That--that's fine FART if-URP-if I ev-URP-er SMELLED it. Aha, am-amirite, lay-URP-ladies?" He soon stopped laughing at his own joke when he heard all four voices of the women go simultaneously ,"Excuse me."

THAT was when shit hit the fan. Aw, Jesus, really? Although he worn the girls down all night and finally had them eating out of the palms of his hands, he rather not deal with that fucking monstrosity of a mess. He didn't want to chance it. He had delt with their species before and even though he was into freaky shit, there was NO preparing him from that rabbit hole he had once delved into years ago. He STILL had nightmares. They had only ONE FUCKING ASSHOLE, which meant they only had one...you know... Why couldn't he just find some simple lifeform to have a good fuck with? Why did EVERYTHING always HAVE to be complicated? And gross? He wasn't speciesist, but... Rick took a couple swigs of his flask and groaned.

"D-damn. Wha--what's a pl-URP-aya gotta do to find an easy fuck?" He mumbled to himself, keeping his eyes concentrated on his drink. He was ready to go home.

Now knowing what the girls, or rather, individual actually was, He had lost interest. 

Trying to ditch them, Rick had made up an bullshit excuse about checking on his grandson (who he had left alone to fend for himself.)

Finding Morty awkwardly standing against a wall, Rick sighed and slurped down the rest of his flask. 

Pocketing the silver container, Rick then took out his portal gun, beginning to dial the coordinates to take them home.

"R-Rick, are--are... we going n-now?"

Rick heard a collective sound of angry, feminine snarls and felt himself being picked off the ground and thrown at the ping-pong table, breaking it in half.  
Did he mention that the quadruple girls had tentacles? Yeah... Guess where they came from.

Morty yelped. "RICK!"

Forcing himself up, he shot his portal gun and grabbed Morty. Giving everyone the middle finger, he yelled, " Peace among woORlds, you pieces of shit!" 

Everyone else in the room cheered, unaware of what was REALLY going on, but just going along with whatever Rick said. 

The sea of a wild crowd caused the four-sided bitch to be pushed away from them, but not enough to make a proper escape. Wrapping a slithering appendage onto Morty's leg.

Morty screamed. "R-RICK!"

Rick ran into the portal, yanking Morty in, which caused the girls to lose their grip.

They angrily fumed and used the rest of their tentacles to lift themselves among the masses of people raving and went through, following the pair.

After realizing they had ended up ONCE again in the worlds of farting asses, Rick had begun shooting and running through portals. Finally losing them in a Universe where everyone had the face of a dildo, they layed low and used the portal gun to go home.

 

This was only the beginning.

**Author's Note:**

> Grammar hurts my eyes malomar bars. yes I am an adult


End file.
